7 Days & 7 Nights of Silence in the ICU

We need true friends, real friends when we face difficult days. Although a good portion of this book focuses on the tactless and theologically incorrect things that are said by Job’s three “comforters,” there are some very praiseworthy and laudable items that should be noted about “The Original Three Amigos” (Swindoll’s description).

Job 2:11 Now when Job's three friends heard of all this adversity (from the Adversary) that had come upon him, they came each one from his own place, Eliphaz the Temanite, Bildad the Shuhite, and Zophar the Naamathite; and they made an appointment together to come to sympathize with him and comfort him.

Commentators suggest that these three men came from a distance of about 300 miles. Perhaps they were kings, perhaps they were very wealthy sheiks, perhaps they were business acquaintances of Job. Whatever the connection, when they heard of all the adversity that had befallen Job, they agreed to travel to the land of Uz to visit their friend.

The word “adversity” (“RA” in the Hebrew) possibly comes from a root meaning “to break in pieces, to smash, to crush.” That certainly describes Job’s situation: the man and his family were broken and crushed.

K&D write, “Reports spread among the mounted tribes of the Arabian desert with the rapidity of telegraphic dispatches.” So when the three Amigos heard of all of the “RA” that had befallen their friend, they dropped what they were doing and made the effort to visit him. The four men had most likely made a covenant that if any of them should ever be facing a time of extreme difficulty, they would come to the aid of the one in trouble. Hartley states, “Friends often solemnized their relationship with a covenant, promising to care for each other under all kinds of circumstances.” They were friends in the truest sense of the word and their original motives were simple and pure – they wanted to help and comfort and bring solace.

The most prominent of the three was Eliphaz (the name means “God is fine gold”) from Teman. Adam Clarke says “Eliphaz was the king of the Temanites and was one of the sons of Esau.” The people of Teman were celebrated for their knowledge and wisdom. Bildad the Shuhite was the next man. A friend of mine asked me one time, “Do you know who the shortest man in the Bible is?” I figured Zaccheus. “Nope, not Zaccheus; and nope, not Nehemiah (knee-high-miah). The shortest man in the Bible? Well that would be none other than Bildad the “SHOE-HEIGHT!" My friend who loved saying that? Dave Short (I’m serious :>). Zophar the Naamathite was the third friend in this triad.

(Did you ever wonder if Job had other friends that should have showed up at his lonely ash heap? Perhaps he did, but perhaps they just didn’t want to make the effort to visit him.)

So they made an appointment to “sympathize” with him and to “comfort” him (legend says that the three arrived at Job’s home at the exact same time). Hartley states that the word sympathize (or console) means literally “to shake the head or to rock the body back and forth.” And the word “comfort” is the same Hebrew word that is used in Psalm 23:4, “…Thy rod and Thy staff they comfort me.”

Job 2:12 And when they lifted up their eyes at a distance, and did not recognize him, they raised their voices and wept. And each of them tore his robe, and they threw dust over their heads toward the sky.

Have you ever gone to visit someone in the hospital that was seriously ill and you hadn’t seen them for a long time? And when you did finally see them you couldn't believe your eyes because their appearance had so radically changed? That was Job. He was disfigured beyond recognition. Adam Clarke says, “They were astonished at the unprecedented change which had taken place in the circumstances of this most eminent man.” His misery was shocking. K&D write, “They saw a form which seemed to be Job but in which they were not able to recognize him.” And Hartley states, “When these friends caught their first glimpse of Job from afar, they were aghast. All of Job’s former estate, which once dominated the landscape, had been devastated.”

“They “lifted up their eyes” – and when they saw just a shell of a man named Job – “they lifted up their voices!” These guys did not come with a motive to reproach or to blame or to accuse Job of being a hypocrite. FIA says, “They were genuine friends whose motives were to console and comfort him.” These were not professional mourners – these were friends overwhelmed by the despair and disfigurement of a man they loved. They lifted their eyes, they lifted their voices, they wept, they tore their robes and then they threw dust over their heads.

Job 2:13 Then they sat down on the ground with him for seven days and seven nights with no one speaking a word to him, for they saw that {his} pain was very great.

Perhaps the three first went to Job’s home. As they knocked on the door they couldn’t help but notice the devastation surrounding them; the burned buildings, the pall of death hanging over the area, and the small cemetery on the hillside. When Mrs. Job finally came to the door and the three men asked if they could see their friend, they were appalled when she replied, “Job is living out at the dump.”

This is a remarkable verse, and two little words almost go unnoticed. Those words? “…with him...” A lot of negative comments have been written about Eliphaz, Bildad and Zophar (and rightly so). But these guys took time off from work, traveled the 300 miles to Uz, and cared for Job so much so that they sat on the ash heap with him! Three men of renown (kings?)…sitting on a heap of rotting, stinking garbage and excrement…in an effort to console the specter of their friend Job. FIA says, “Attention is focused, not on the abstract mystery of evil, not on the moral question of underserved suffering, but on one man’s physical existence in bodily pain…they were true friends bringing to Job’s lonely ash heap the compassion of a silent presence.” Sometimes people don’t need a theological treatise. They simply need someone to sit “with them” on their ash heap.

They sat with him…for 7 days and 7 nights. What’s noteworthy about that length of time? It was the official length of time for mourning for the dead! Adam Clarke says, “So calamitous was the state of Job, that they considered him as a dead man.”

“With no one speaking a word.” JFB states, “It is only ordinary griefs that find vent in language – extraordinary griefs are too great for words." Why the silence? “They saw that his pain was great.”

Sometimes the best thing to say to someone facing a difficult time is…nothing. During a month-long stay in the hospital I had many truly wonderful people visit and pray and bring very comforting words. But I also had (on a couple of occasions) visitors that I wished would have just gone away. Why? They talked incessantly or gave some superficial spiritual diagnosis as to why I was in the hospital.

Let me close with these words (quoted by Swindoll on page 53) from Joe Bayly’s book titled, “The Last Thing We Talk About” (The Bayly’s had lost three of their children):

I was sitting, torn by grief. Someone came and talked to me of God’s dealings, of why it happened, of hope beyond the grave. He talked constantly; he said things I knew were true.
I was unmoved, except I wished he’d go away. He finally did.
Another came and sat beside me. He didn’t talk. He didn’t ask leading questions. He just sat beside me for an hour and more, listened when I said something, answered briefly, prayed simply, left.
I was moved. I was comforted. I hated to see him go.


(Please feel free to copy, print, or email any of these devotionals)

NASV = New American Standard Version
OT = Old Testament
K&D = Commentary by Keil and Delitzsch (from PC Bible Study)
JFB = Commentary by Jamieson, Fausset, and Brown (from PC Bible Study)
Adam Clarke = Adam Clarke Commentary (from PC Bible Study)
Barnes = Barnes Notes (from PC Bible Study)
Hartley = The New International Commentary on the Old Testament:
The Book of Job by John E. Hartley
Swindoll = Job, Profiles in Character from Charles R. Swindoll
FIA = Tyndale OT Commentaries: Job by Francis I. Anderson